Please give me some advice about my marriage/wife?

I've been married 21 years. I have 3 kids. I've got 2 boys 9 and 13 and a daughter that is 19 still at home. About 3 weeks ago I left. Let me back up. Early on in our marriage up until about 8 years ago my wife claims that my family (sisters and mom) mistreated her. She claims that they made fun of her, lied on her, stabbed her in the back. I did notice my sisters being bitches to her. I've had to get on to them a couple of times... My mother. I never really seen my mother mistreat her, but my wife said she did. Well, eventually my wife cut them out of her life (except for my mom) and asked me to please stand up for her. I did and I cut them off too. Well, my mom has been riding me to have a relationship with my other family members again and I keep telling her not until they apologize to my wife for threatening her and harassing her via email. They say that they don't owe my wife an apology. Well, the other night I was telling my wife about my sister being sick and she blew up. She said she didn't care. She called me a sorry SOB, said she hated me... I left. I've been gone for 3 weeks. There were other problems too. I've got a temper and sometimes the kids and my wife make me angry. Sometimes I yell and scream. I have called my boys retards on many occasions and I've been known to call them all pigs if the house isn't picked up. I haven't gotten physically abusive with her in a long while... Anyway, she sent me a text today saying that I was abusive for 21 years and that she's not letting the boys go anywhere with me. She also said that she WILL NEVER let my boys have anything to do with my family because of the way they've treated her. I guess she's afraid they'll try and talk bad about her to the kids. My daughter won't answer my calls. My daughter says that her mom has had to put up with my abuse for 21 years and that I shouldn't expect her mom to put up with my family's abuse and that I should not go around those family members. I just need some input here. My wife called me, asked me to come home, but I hung up on her. We've been through a lot of hard times... What do you all think I should do? This woman told me she hated me, wished I was dead, called me a sorry SOB... I'm sick of it.Please give me some advice about my marriage/wife?
Your first responsibility is to your wife and children. Your sisters were being horribly rude to your wife and it should of been stopped a LONG time ago. There is a lot of anger and resentment on your wife's part about this and I can understand that.





As for the verbal abuse, that was stupid of you and self-serving. It is one thing to say: ';a bunch of pigs live in this house.'; it is yet another thing to say that your kids are retards....self-serving again.





You need to fix your marriage and if your church is telling you to divorce for any other reason except for adultery, you should find another church.





Both you and your wife are at fault and both of you need to grow up. Stop being so concerned about your own wants and needs and start caring about the other person. If you can fix your marriage you can save your family. God speed to you.Please give me some advice about my marriage/wife?
i think you should go home and talk to her tell her how you fill bc know matter what your kids love you in need you there in their life(speaking from experience with my dad)
Pretty complicated for sure. I have been to 2 counsellers with my wife and ended it yesterday but at least the issues are a little clearer in my mind so I can move on. There was no abuse physically but we both had anger issues. Our children are full grown so that was not a factor either. I just wish you the best and no matter how bad it is it will get better . Good luck to you and your family
There have been times when I really feel like I hate my husband. I tell him that I hate him and tell him lots of other things too. It's just the anger that takes over. When our husbands don't back us up on the way that we feel, (especially because you know for a fact that your sister mistreated her) we tend to blow up. I can understand where both of yall are coming from. Both of you should apologize and leaving isn't gonna solve anything.
I think you both and the kids need get some kind of counseling very soon, and yes you should go home. I think you both should get involved in a church and take your kids too. You both need to stop fighting, yelling, etc. what you need to do is sit down and listen to each other and love one another and forgive one another. God help this lost family in your son Jesus Christ Amen.
I am a woman that has not been physically abused but very verbally abused by her spouse for 17 years. I must admit that his abuse has lead me to smack him across the face many times. What I would really like from him but never get is a sincere apology and an acknowlegement of the hurt he has caused. If you love your family you need to say you are truly sorry and mean it and change some how. Good luck I am sure it is hard.
Well, take it from someone that has been on the other end of the inlaws abuse. I have the motherinlaw from Hell and my husband never stood up for me. So, I can see her point. There are 2 sides to every story however. The only thing I can suggest is marriage counseling and that will only work if both of you want to save the marriage. It just depends on how much damage has been done on both sides. I wish I knew what to tell you. It's a hard situation to be in. Good luck to you.
I feel sorry for you my friend. I am 55 yrs old, been married twice. Married now and I know it can be very trying at times. I think you should go talk to some professionals.. and get opinions from them.


You are in a real bad state of affairs right now and only some professional help will get you through it.


My opinion anyway, Goodluck to you.

acne