MORE ADVICE PLEASE! Marriage or friendship?

So I am 23 my husband is 24, we've been married for two yrs. We were best friends for 6 yrs before we married, dated for 1 MONTH then got married. Crazy yes i know. I am at the point where i truly feel like we are just friends. He is unaffectionate and unloving even after addressing the problem a yr ago. He doesn't like to have sex and i am pretty much a nympho.I haven't had an orgasm in 2 yrs because once he's done were done. We have a good time together but i am always wanting more. I tried being super affectionate to him in hopes it would rub off.. no luck. I don't want to do counseling bc i feel like love is an emotion/feeling and if you care about someone you act on it, someone shouldn't have to tell him how to love me when i am telling him what i need. On top of it all i work with someone who i just have a very strong attraction to. He doesn't even know but i feel something towards him that i don't towards my husband. And that scares the crap outta me. I grew up in an environment that affection was non-existent in and refuse to do the same when i have kids. I feel like getting divorced now while no children are involved would be better. Please any advice will be appreciated.MORE ADVICE PLEASE! Marriage or friendship?
Try marital counseling. How is it all good for 6 years and then it turns to crap in 2? You owe it to yourselves to try some therapy. Nothing you have mentioned here can't be fixed.MORE ADVICE PLEASE! Marriage or friendship?
Yep... sounds like a ';friendship marriage';... but it takes a lot more than that to hold it together......and yours has come apart. I agree.. time to leave before children are involved. Good luck !
why keep asking this?





until someone tell you that its ok to give up and get a divorce before you've tried counseling?





Go cheat then.
its a hard decision. But I think you should go with what your heart is telling you!
It sounds like you are in a very difficult situation. I strongly encourage you to see professional help before making any choices or decisions that could drastically damage or end your marriage. I understand you are in need of a loving and intimate relationship, and I would imagine your husband is feeling this need as well, but may be displaying his dissatisfaction in other ways. Since you are not getting what you desire from your relationship, you naturally are turning to outside sources to fill that void, and while this seems enticing, you will only be hurting yourself and your 'best friend'; by allowing yourself to fall into what seems to be temporary need satisfaction relationship.


You do have a very positive point of hope in your relationship. You say you are ';Best Friends'; with this man. How amazing would it be to have your ';best friend'; become the husband you so desire? Please seek counseling. Open the lines of communication and clearly define what you need from your marriage. Exhaust all options before allowing yourself to ';give up'; o the marriage, preventing your from future regret that you didn't do enough or made a hasty decision.


Best Wishes,








Coach Jenna





www.seedsofhopelc.com
even if you decide to get out of the marriage, your still not ready to go off and date anyone there is a healing process I wouldn't want to be a rebound be sure your willing to end your marriage, theres always going to be someone else out there your attracted to.. does that mean to end marriage every time, you knew your were marrying your Friend. work on your marriage or leave it but do it because its the right thing not because there someone else your attracted to
';On top of it all i work with someone who i just have a very strong attraction to. ';








Why did I know that was coming? You, my dear, are looking for a prelude to end the marriage or if anything have an affair. You don't need advice. You already have a damn good idea of what you're going to do.





Tell me something. Known each other for 6 years. Six goddamn years...so marriage in a month is no big deal in my book. During that entire time, you never saw this lack of sex drive, no affection part? Or are you confusing sex with affection? Which seems to be the case as the major factors are lack of orgasms and you're a 'nympho' as you so delicately put it.





So...it boils down to the fact he can't satisfy that itch between your legs.





Then either divorce or buy a vibrator. That's the best advice I can offer. Oh..and make sure the guy in the office meets your sexual qualifications and you miss the possibility he may have the makings of a wife beater or be unfaithful.
I have mixed feelings for an answer. My gut is to say-yes, leave him before you get kids involved. But, I believe you only get married once. Also, if you were friends for six years....Why would you marry him if it took that long to feel something more than friendship? Especially after a month. Friendship and relationships take different kind of commitments and feelings. So I am more inclined to say that this is your fault for not taking the time that making that kind of decision requires. Also, it sounds like you have seen something better, which is why this is coming up after 2 years of a loveless marriage. The grass is always greener, right? None of us can tell you how to live your life. But it sounds like you don't know what you want just yet, and if you are going to pull out of a marriage, know what you're getting into the next time. And THINK!
Before trying the ';divorce'; option, try actually talking to your husband about how you feel about your marriage feeling more like a friendship than a loving marriage. Maybe if you actually talked it over he may be more aware to your needs OR he may help you get to a decision of the marriage just not working out. Maybe you two could try marriage counsling to help work on the things needed, such as attention sexually and emotionally. Hope the best.