Can God help us fall in love again?
I just don't feel the same way - could it be my hormones after giving birth, my son is 2.
My husband hasn't shown me love and support in the way I needed. I have talked to him about this for years, and it is only now that he read a book about love languages that he has made a real effort but I don't know if it is too late. I don't feel the same way. Especially sexually - I feel no passion for him.
Helpful advice please.CHRISTIANS advice in marriage if you fall out of love?
i am speaking as a Christian here.
every day we choose! do we follow how we feel or do we follow what the Word of God says. hard! yet with Him nothing is impossible!
been there, many times.
choose how you will act, do acts of love for your husband, simple things, not talking about sex. (DO NOT expect him to turn straight away) you are accountable to God only by yourself how and what you do. marriage is commitment, day by day learning to live together with the highs and lows. choose to love God first and He will lead you.
read the book, Inside a Woman, by Jane Hansen. i can send you one if you like.
email me if you want to talk some moreCHRISTIANS advice in marriage if you fall out of love?
You must be quiet and listen to your heart. If divine love married you, then you know what is up, and a healing can come, but if your hearts never joined in one spiritual union prior to marriage, then divorce is an option. If there is truly no spiritual love, then there is no joy, and you have nothing to hold onto. Give the burden to God and listen to your heart.
Please dont divorce him, for your childs sake.
make a list about all of the reasons you fell in love with him in the first place.
make a list about everything he has in him that is unlike anyone else
do things with him that dont have to be sexual just things to get to know him again
stay up all night and talk about random dreams or anything
take a paintingclass together
let your child be babysat while you go out to dinner together
talk to him. tell him how you feel.
dont divorce him. God approves of it but only if he is abusing you or if he is a drunk/etc.
if tehre is nothing wrong wth him, just the flame is gone, then try to rekindle it.
give it a second try hopefully it iwll work
+I think you have to pray about this.
In the name of Jesus,
I pray God renew the passion, and intimate intensity between you and your husband. I pray both of you reach new levels of excitment and intensity in physical passion and ecstasy. I pray a new understanding, love and devotion develop and grow to fullness between you and your husband. God Bless, seek and you shall find.
Because he has not shown you the love and support is possibly making you Desire him less. Or you could have damage from your pregnancy taking sensation away. You could have hormone imbalance as well. Have any back problems with your lower back or other parts? Look into subluxation if you have any back problems.
Don't divorce just simply over sex or because you don't feel like you love each other anymore. If he becomes impossible to live by treating you like crap, with then that is a means to divorce.
Everyone goes through similar trials.
Pack a bag and take your kid, get a break, get your head and heart together.
Men sometimes don't know how to express their feelings.
Love is a decision you make sometimes...and you may one day find that the love you feel in the beginning only scratches the surface of what love really is later on.
I don't want to tell you what to do either way, but I hope you don't split up. Treat one another with respect, and be friends to one another at least. Find a common ground, and above all, take care of yourself. Little kids can kill the romance faster than cupid's arrow can fly. They're demanding and tyrannical...experts at wearing out grown people.
Both of you, read the book ';Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars.'; By John Gray.
That is the most helpful relationship healing book EVER written.
My opinion is that you should try one more time to make this work. You've got kids together, and the love can still be there.
I'm not religious, but i still say try just once more. If there's just absolutely nothing left, time to divorce. It might not be practical in your beliefs, but do you really want to be in a loveless marriage for the rest of your life?
its not too late, just pray. go to marrige counceling, think about what you have been doing together. think about what made you marry eachother in the first place. and BE HONEST. no holding back allowed. and do this together, and keep your son in mind.
watch the movie ';fireproof.'; then find a church that offers the ';fireproof'; counseling session. it's well worth your time and effort!
Divorce and never go back.
work on it you have to show him love and that you are worthy. love God first and all else will follow.
Make it work...
Have your tried tellin him that?
HE has probably gotten complacent assuming that you still don't need attention..
So instead of expecting him to have to realize you need that attention back, tell him.
';Fall out of love';? Turn off the soap opera and come back to earth. Are you even old enough to be married?
Honestly, and I'm not a Christian, but if you have fallen out of love, you can try to reignite whatever spark there was when you first got together. Try telling him everything you want to say, and what you need to change. Don't be surprised if he feels the same way. You can work on it, but think about this. You say your son is two, which I assume means you are fairly young, as well. Do you want to the live the rest of your life in a loveless marriage that offers no support? Believe me, your son is going to get to an age, if you decide to stay together, where he will resent both of you. You're setting an example for him. I would try for awhile, and if nothing happens, think about divorce. It may go against your beliefs, but do you want to be unhappy for the rest of your life? Do you want to potentially make your son unhappy? Staying together for a child, as good intentioned as it seems, is one of the worst things you can do.
When we are young, we are seduced by hormones and false beliefs. Instead of concentrating on sexuality and hormones, there must be other things that you found attractive in your husband. If you start looking for those things and reinforce them by being positive, you will change your mindset. I'm not discounting the value of sex. It is a wonderful thing. Why are you depriving yourself of it?
It is like raising a child. Instead of pointing out the negative and reinforcing that, look for positive things to reinforce. Only reinforce (comment on) those behaviors that you want repeated. If you praise a child, he will feel good about the behavior and have pleasant thoughts while doing that. If you give negative feedback, they will have bad thoughts and lower self-esteem.
While you are looking for the positive, you will also change your focus.
I find it interesting that this happened after the birth of your child. You were probably sleep derived like any mother. Has your self-image changed since becoming a mother? Have you lost your identity?
The total context was about yourself and your needs. In a marriage, you need to realize that if you are distancing yourself, your husband feels abandoned. The distance just grows larger.
Be respectful and kind and act like you are in love. I can't speak for God, but I know that I want you to be happy. You are half-way there by acknowledging that this is coming from within yourself.
Best wishes and I hope that knowing somebody out there loves you and your husband and your 2 year-old without knowing you... helps. You have much more control over your life than you give yourself credit. When you married, you promised. What did that promise mean to you? ';In sickness and in health';....
You need to make up your mind that you really do love him still,because obviously you do,you married him because you loved him.Love never stops,it is unconditional.What ever you do please don't give up .I encourage you to get closer to GOD and take your troubles and cares to JESUS.HE can restore the love you and him have for each other,believe me.This world has one objective, and it's for our heart,we tend to focus on what this world offers and what we need to get it for our family and we loose sight of each other most times.Even the WORD OF GOD says that we cannot love two masters,because we eventually love one more then the other, but I tell you this if you can allow GODS WORD to speak to you and believe it with your whole heart then GOD will take control of your marriage, because GOD IS LOVE, and HE hates divorces.Don't loose hope.Come to GOD today, and receive the free gift of salvation in CHRIST JESUS, and put your faith in GODS promises for you and your family,and I know you'll be glorifying GOD in the future for answering your prayers. GOD BLESS!!
No God does not approve of divorce. God definitely does not approve of remarriage. Remarriage is adultery and it is a damnable sin. Love is more then a feeling it is a command. You need to pray often for God to give you a heart of love for your spouse. I do not know about your hormones. Be please guard your thoughts Satan wants to take you with him. My wife left me and married another man. I will remain faithful to my wife and to my God. Hang in there this is a test of your faith. There are conditions that pertain to Salvation. Please be very careful about you thought life they can and do bring about actions that you may regret for an eternity.
You attitude (passion) can be changed by you and what you tell yourself. Please do not feed yourself negative thoughts. I know what these things can lead too. Turn to God and He will help.
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