I know I have posted Q.s like this before. But need advice about Marriage.?

Ok, I have been with my husband for 8 yrs. We have two small children (ages 7 and 3) We have seperated many times, Because he has hit me in the past and he never paid any attention to the kids, and has twisted the oldest's arm, and never paid any attention to me in the past. Me and the kids left a few weeks ago, and I let him come back (dumb I know) cause he said he would change again and someone said maybe I should give him two weeks if he deosnt straighten up by then, then make him leave. He is trying and doing a little bit of stuff with the kids. He is trying with me, but I am sorry, I dont love him, I fell out of love with him, and now that he is back here, I cant stand it. It is driving me nuts. I hate to say that , but its the truth. I tried and tried, but no go. I dont know what to do. I want what is best for my kids. But I am not happy with him here, and I hate it. I truely dont love him. Has anyone else been in this situation before? What did you do?I know I have posted Q.s like this before. But need advice about Marriage.?
my friends parents story, word for word. after he came back she couldnt stand him even though his behaiour was alright..but she kept her mouth shut. she didnt want to put her kids through a divorce. but in the end, years later, she couldnt take it anymore, and they got divorced anyway. i figure she shouldve done it earlier on when the kids would just accept the facts and not properly understand it, and the acceptance would have been easier as they grew up and learned that this is better.


best of luck.I know I have posted Q.s like this before. But need advice about Marriage.?
What are you still doing with him? No way should you let someone treat you like that. Or your children. Kick him to the curb and stand up for your self. If you can't do it for your self do it for your kids. They dont need to see things like and DON';T need to be abused either. Don't worry about what other people did or do. Worry about getting out of the situation.
Tell him to leave and file for divorce ASAP. Never stay with a person you don't love. Be selective next time around.
What are you looking for here? Validation? Sympathy? Criticism? Whatever it is, it's not advice. You already know what to do. The fact that you aren't doing it points to emotional issues that have nothing to do with him. Either you have guilt issues and the punishment he deals out satisfies that guilt, or you have self esteem issues that make you need to feel wanted/loved/desired, even by a complete pig.


Your moralizing about sticking it out, trying to make the marriage work, etc. are mere rationalizations. The marriage not working out is not why you're feeling guilty. That guilt came long before the marriage hosed. Subconsiously, guilt is probably the reason you married him in the first place. Someone has loaded you with emotional baggage so heavy that you seek out abuse (which hurts) so you can ease the constant feeling of guilt you have (which hurts even worse).





Get some counselling. Not for your marriage. Not for him. For you.