I keep creating financial problems and it sabotages our marriage - I need advice?

I have caused, over 15 years 4 major financial problems. Each time I worked with my husband to pay them off. We were in a good place until 2 wks ago. My husband misplaced his wallet. I found it. The day after (in between pays) I had to buy some groceries and gas up the vehicle. I used his bank card. I hadn't told him I had found his wallet (he was working shift work) and then later realized that he would then think that I withheld it all along... which wasn't true. I returned the wallet to where i originally found it. He later discovered it. And the fact that I had used the card. He freaked. Rightfully so. I have been so low and remorseful and really apologetic. I have even signed over my paycheque to him to give him the control of the accounts. He is civil with me now, but there isn't any warmth. I know I deserve it, but I want to make amends over this. I hate the feeling that he cant' trust me. I want to change but don't know how. I really need some advice -I keep creating financial problems and it sabotages our marriage - I need advice?
The kind of spending you describe is because there is a lack of something else in your life. You spend to either make yourself feel good, to get even or to replace something that is missing in your life. I would say because of the wallet incident that whatever is lacking in your life may very well be within your marriage or to do with your husband. You can try and figure out what triggers your spending and then find something else to do to fill that void. If it is your husband, then maybe you could sit down and talk with him, tell him how you are feeling and tell him why you over spend. He might be willing to help you with the problem if he knows the reason for the problem. If you can't figure it out on your own, than maybe you should consider getting some counseling. Good Luck!





S.S.I keep creating financial problems and it sabotages our marriage - I need advice?
stop spending unnecessarily and talk to your husband b 4 making any big purchases
Excuse me!!! You didn't do anything wrong here. You had valid expenses and had every right to pay for them with his card. His money is your money just like your money is his money. If your other major financially problems were of this nature then I hate to tell you this, but this guy is abusing you. I mean verbally and psychologically. You shouldn't be afraid to pay for basic expenses. In fact you should be an equal partner in this relationship financially. The fact this guy is controlling you and making you feel bad over something so small is disgusting.
My patented one step solution to getting and staying out of debt:


Don't buy things you can not afford!
Start going to counseling. At least he'll see you are trying to correct the problems.





Good luck to you!
first off you are not honest, so he can't really trust you. you stole his wallet and tried to hide it.


get honest first!
You did not do any thing wrong. You were doing your duty as a wife, looking after the needs of the home. You needed gas to run errand an other such stuff--if you had not done it and ran out of gas, and had to have called him on his job to come and get you,he would still be treateing you the same way.





Let him stew in is juices for a while, and Give Him to JESUS and watch the Lord Move! You do not deserve to be treated so poorly just because he has issues.
just give it time and control your needs allow him to give you an allowance and accept it but part of marriage is trust build it up and wait till you both are finicaly ready to splurge men worry to much about money and keeping there family with a roof over there head understand why they try to keep track of that and listen to what he is about Not just they want to build security for there retirement just imagine if all that responsibility and except it slow it down and let him do his job in keeping all of your needs ...........basically trust does not come over night it takes time and patience imagine it this way you guys have a basket and you both put love money and trust in it if one takes things out of it and doesn't put it its not fair for the other to keep putting in and the other taking it out just keep putting in the basket and you will see alot of great things that come out later in life ..........
lady, stop spending. and please be honest with your husband. it seems he really loves you to have been there in the mess not once not twice but 4 times. wake up now at least. help him shape ur relationship as he wants it financially secure.
Stop spending!
You need to start thinking before you do things!!! Communication is the key to a good marriage
You don't pool your resources? Hmmm. Typically, this really shouldn't cause a problem. The fact that you are scared isn't a good sign. A marriage is about trust and open lines of communication. It sounds like there are deeper issues than just money.





%26gt;%26gt;People. ';Just pray and everything will be okay'; is horrible advice.%26gt;%26gt;
all you need do just go through your life with your marriage and just pray and your problem will go away soon